As I reflect 2011, yes, I know it is not over yet, I realize how far I have come in dealing with expectations that didn’t match reality. 😦 Initially, after a disappointment, I lowered my expectation. Well, that didn’t work! Anyways, how could that work for a perfectionist in recovery? Seriously? No thanks! I tried so many things: temper tantrums, depression, crying, pity parties, need I humiliate myself further? After many dramatic and emotional reactions, I reverted to childhood (that which is sub-consciously comfortable).
My childhood taught me that if things don’t go according to plan, it must have been something that I did wrong…I didn’t plan well enough, I didn’t research it well…….I just didn’t do something right. While this mindset has benefited me in honest evaluation of myself, it is not beneficial in yielding myself completely to God; which is the approach that I have learned to be most successful of all that I have tried.
So, I throw it out to you! How do YOU handle it when your plans or expectations do not meet your reality?
This is how LoLo rolls on this topic…
- I Let it go! I have learned that walking away helps my type ‘A’ personality to de-stress
- I Open myself to instruction and evaluation from God (not me)! I am naturally very critical of myself! So, I have learned that talking to God honestly and very candidly and listening for His direction and instruction presents a very different emotion about the situation. Whichever method He chooses to speak to me is fine; the important part is that I am open to receive! 🙂
- Trust God! This has been the greatest area of growth for me because there is something about my human nature that says if it didn’t go as planned it must be ME! That can be true, but this is not the case all the time. Trusting in God takes that burden away and regardless of the reason, He has been faithful to provide me with everything that I need.
- Be Patient! Realize that it is never taking as long as it seems and that it will work out!
We have to realize that we are just beginning although it feels as though we have been going forever and a day! Please comment and share your emotions, thoughts, & behavior when expectation doesn’t meet reality in your world!
Thanks for listening and sharing!